Au Pair Tips - What Annoys Host Families

What Annoys Host Families?

 

1. Showing up for work late or not ready to take over.  The primary complaint is that au pairs wake up a few minutes before they are supposed to start and have not showered, dressed, or eaten breakfast when they are supposed to start.  Remember that your work hours are exactly that – work hours.  You are supposed to be watching the children, doing chores or driving to pick up the children.  You can’t do this if you are still getting dressed or eating.  This means that starting your breakfast when you are supposed to be watching the child is not ok.  Also, if you appear on the scene on the exact moment you are supposed to start, it doesn’t give your host parent any time to give you instructions before they go out the door. 
2. Eating habits and costs.  Most families are very accommodating in buying food for you that you like or giving you some money for food that you desire.  Some families feel that au pairs either A. Eat everything in the cabinets or refrigerator without asking, or B. buy expensive food with the host parents’ money.  Please be sensitive to the fact that there are others in the house and that perhaps some special food has been purchased for a party they are having or for special needs of the children.  If you are unsure about what you are allowed to eat – ask!  Also, if your host family allows you to use their money/credit cards to buy food – then please realize that this money is not limitless – you should not be constantly buying expensive prepared foods, snacks, sodas and candies with your host family’s money.  Make sure you give them a receipt from the grocery/drug store and ask them before you buy things if it is ok for you to buy certain things you like.  You should be willing to prepare some of your own meals (if you aren’t eating with the host family).  Your host family is responsible for feeding you but that does not mean that they have to pay for the most expensive option or for every extra sweet snack you desire.  You are supposed to use your pocket money for this.  Also, if you eat with your host family – please make sure you help with dinner in some way (either cooking or cleaning up).
3. Rushing out the door at the end of the day or hanging around the host families too much.  Either extreme is generally not good.  Host families want you to have fun and go out and host parents occasionally need their privacy, so give them some space if you find yourself at home a lot.  On the other hand, if you are running out the door the second you are done with work every day, this is also not good.  It sends the message that you are only here to socialize with friends and don’t want a relationship with the host family.  Each family is different in their expectations.  Remember that many host families will not tell you that you are in the way or that you should stay home or eat dinner with them sometimes.  They feel uncomfortable saying these things and worry that you will either go out more or stay home more but will resent it.  The best bet is to strike a happy medium.  Also – remember that most host families LOVE to hear about their kids and enjoy it when you tell them something fun you did with their kids or something good or helpful their kids did.  This shows you like being with their children and makes them feel you are doing a good job.  Reserve negative comments about the kids for times the children are not present.